This past Saturday was absolutely one of those days where you could sit down at noon and remain glued to the set for 12+ hours without noticing it. Work wasn’t done. You probably pissed off your better half. Most importantly, you feel yourself getting fatter. We deserved that weekend though. It was a glorious makeup call from last weekend’s mung rag.
Graaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaasss . . . What the hell was in LSU’s bathwater that made their defense absolutely jello armed and unable to make a single stop in Athens? Don’t get me wrong, Georgia’s offense is one of the best in the country, but I really thought LSU had enough in the tank to hold them in check on at least a couple drives. LSU football is tough. LSU football wins games ugly. LSU football doesn’t give up points. So it’s only fitting that Georgia’s game winning pass was a 25 yard bomb to beat a LSU team that wasn’t playing LSU football.
And, as great of a game as it was, please stop referring to Saturday’s LSU-Georgia game as the “early leader for game of the year”. As exciting and riveting as it was, it was a match that just bastardized the whole idea of defense to the tune of 85 points and 950 yards. Barn burners are fun, but a “game of the year” needs more than two teams running out 11 guys as a placeholder until the offense can make their way back onto the field.
Ignore what I say . . . Just three days ago I said LSU was the best team in the SEC. OOOOOOPS. Looks like this is going to be one of those seasons where the top teams in the conference all take turns beating each other. Although, Alabama . . . well, I’ll get to that.
I say, “Chalupas for everyone!” . . . Remember the SEC’s argument that the Big 12 offenses were the result of bad defenses, and that would never fly in the SEC?
We don’t need no stinkin’ defense . . . Did the entire SEC forget how to play defense? Much of their success over the past two decades has been built upon the foundation of ravaging defenses. Outside of Florida, every single team in the conference has looked bad defensively this year.
Health care? I wash myself with a rag on a stick . . . That’s the best you got Big Ten? That’s the team that is most likely to challenge Ohio State this season? That’s your response to Urban Meyer? The final score was close and all, but I saw an Ohio State team up 31-14 hit the brakes thinking Wisconsin was spent. Give the badgers credit as the crawled back into the game, but it didn’t take long for the Buckeyes to regain their composure and get Joel Stave all alcohol shaky again.
Drop it like it’s hot, drop like it’s hot . . . The Big Ten continues their downward spiral toward Big Eastiness. As a conference, they’re plummeting. Much of the Big Ten can’t put together a full roster. Nebraska’s offense and Michigan State’s defensive units are two of the best individual units in the country. But look on the other side of the ball for each team and WOOOF. They just lack competency. It’s odd, who would’ve thought the additions of Rutgers and Maryland, who both join the conference next year, would have been a stark improvement for Big Ten football.
The term you’re looking for is Northwesterned . . . it happens to a Big Ten team at least once a year. They show up to play the Wildcats, only to find out the Wildcats came to play too, and better. With GameDay in town, this is the biggest Northwestern game in…ever.
The Big Ten in a nutshell . . . Northwestern has looked much better than “football schools” Michigan, Wisconsin, and Nebraska. Northwestern vs. Ohio State doesn’t really mean that much right now, because the two teams will probably meet again in the Big Ten title game. Although, if Northwestern wins, get ready for a lot of bullshit media hype about them having an outside chance at the National Title game. Just ignore it. They’re not THAT good.
Black and white television. A full game of Monopoly. Grapenuts! Am I the only man in America that enjoys a good ball control offense? The final score wasn’t sexy, but Alabama absolutely laid the wood to the mouthy runny Ole Miss squad. In this expansive world known as the media, you can quickly tell the guys who didn’t watch the game because they looked at the box score, saw 25-0, and declared it another down game for the Tide. Ball control and defense. It’s the reason the Tide have won 3 of the last 4.
ROLL TAHHHHDDDDDDDD . . . Alabama put together an impressive game defensively, finally. Something no one in the SEC has done yet this year. If the D plays like the rest of the season, watch out SEC. There are still a couple of challenging games left for them on the schedule, but Alabama looks like the cream of the conference.
I have the black lung . . . The only upset of the weekend came in Morgantown, as the Mountaineers knocked off Oklahoma State. This was the same West Virginia team that got the hatchet thrown on their hands by Maryland last week. The thing that gets me, is that what I saw of this game, it looked like West Virginia looked pretty solid. Does that mean Maryland…? Nah.
Afterthought . . . That’s what the Big 12 has been this season. With no teams in the top 10, everyone only seem to care about the drama in Austin. And let’s be honest, that’s still the only interesting story line in the Big 12.
LANE KIFFIN NEWS!!! I have a feeling this is my last LANE KIFFIN NEWS!!! in forever. It’s going to require the dumbest Athletic Director in America to name this guy the head man at anything in a long time.
Shocking . . . Not really. Although, getting shit canned at the airport is quite the odd way to lose your job. This is going to be a highly sought after job opening. It will be fascinating to hear the names attached to it. It’s gotta be one of the top 5 jobs in college football right now, right?
The Parent/Sleep thing again . . . I am forever pissed that my responsibilities as a functioning parent caused me to miss Lane Kiffin’s face after watching Arizona State lay 600 and 62 on him.
The no kids lifestyle thing . . . I actually missed the early games because I was out on the golf course. As an adult with no children, I have few responsibilities. My liver hates me for that.
Top 5 high Five . . . Each week we irrationally change our top 5 because we’re not tied to any sort of political dicta that requires an immediate and though provoking reason for changing our top 5.
(5) Ohio State
(5) Ohio State
Preparation leads to, preparation…I try and pride myself on covering all the games that mean something each week. Somehow, when writing this, I forgot that Notre Dame lost to Oklahoma, and I apologize to the Sooners as they’re looking like they could be a top 10 team this fall. On the otherhand, Notre Dame is STRUGGLIN’.