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If it wasn’t for bad luck, Bears wouldn’t have no luck at all

December 22, 2011
By

Here’s the last month for the Chicago Bears:

Nov. 20–Jay Cutler breaks thumb on throwing hand in a win against San Diego, ending a season that saw him playing like an elite QB. Bears are 7-3, playoff chances very solid.

Nov. 27–Backup Caleb Hanie throws three picks and Bears lose to Oakland. 7-4

Dec. 4—This day was all kinds of fun, but comes in second place to Dec. 11′s follies. Stud Matt Forte has his bust-out season ended with a knee injury and Kansas City scores the winning TD on a toss-up from Tyler Palko that is beaten down into the arms of Dexter McCluster. It was Palko’s first NFL TD pass. 7-5.

Dec. 11—Marion Barber. 7-6.

Dec. 14—Finally, some off-field disaster! Sam Hurd’s Chicago drug franchise has an operational glitch when he is arrested for placing an order for weekly deliveries of substances with an undercover officer during a steak dinner. This arrest and possible scope of Hurd’s empire makes the Bears front office look much worse than it already looked for drafting guys like….

Dec. 20—…Gabe Carimi, the 2011 first-round offensive lineman from Wisconsin, who will have a second knee operation from an injury suffered in Week 2.

Dec. 18—-Bears get asses handed to them by Seahawks despite leading at the half. Johnny Knox is gruesomely bent backwards. Hanie again throws three picks, two for TD, one to a fat guy, just like he did in the NFC title game last January. Well, maybe the Hanie thing is not bad luck. 7-7, playoff chances no longer solid.

Also making folks chuckle round these parts is GM Jerry Angelo’s statement in Denver. Yes, he said that Tim Tebow’s performance just might be Divine Intervention, but that’s not the scandal. Angelo also said that 60 percent of evaluating a QB is evaluating intangibles.

Well, at least Bears fans don’t strangle their kids in Chiefs-inspired rages.

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10 Responses to If it wasn’t for bad luck, Bears wouldn’t have no luck at all

  1. knightwhosaysni on December 22, 2011 at 9:07 am

    Happy winter solstice all you heathens!

  2. cycledan on December 22, 2011 at 9:29 am

    Good choice of music.

    Every year there is one team with just awful luck.

    There is a really old Cream song called Born Under a Bad Sign where they have the line “if it wasn’t for bad luck, I would have no luck at all.”

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f1pzXJuvdAY

  3. knightwhosaysni on December 22, 2011 at 9:36 am

    I wonder how excited John is at the possibility of pictures of Monta Ellis’s junk maybe leaking out.

    http://espn.go.com/nba/story/_/id/7376430/golden-state-warriors-monta-ellis-sued-alleged-sexual-texting

  4. Vez on December 22, 2011 at 10:00 am

    cycle the lyric in my head came from a robben ford song, but it was a remake

  5. spencer096 on December 22, 2011 at 10:03 am

    robben ford

    criminally underrated…some of the best guitar tone of all time (no hyperbole).

    example.

  6. Vez on December 22, 2011 at 10:14 am

    spence i have his first cd and tiger walk

  7. Mark Mizerle06 on December 22, 2011 at 10:51 am

    Happy winter solstice all you heathens!

    you too. high of 81 here today.

  8. cycledan on December 22, 2011 at 11:16 am

    criminally underrated…some of the best guitar tone of all time (no hyperbole).

    example.

    Pretty awesome. I actually saw him on TV at some festival that was being rebroadcast on the Palladia station.

  9. Diesel on December 22, 2011 at 12:48 pm

    Some of it is bad luck (injuries) some of it is pure shitty football (Barber, Hanie), some of it is incompetence (Angelo)

  10. cabbage on December 22, 2011 at 12:55 pm

    Love Social Distortion. 99 to Life is my fave.

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